The Problem with Porn

According to Details magazine, 90% of 8-16 year olds have seen online porn. I have no idea the actual reliability of this statistic, but for the sake of this discussion, let us presume that a rising, unacceptable number of children and teens have been exposed to pornography online. I truly believe the online part is crucial, because rest assured, they're not looking at Playboy (the most benign of porn brands).

The article discusses how porn-savvy the boys are (in terms of their ability to classify and rate what they are consuming) are and how porn-ready the girls are (in terms of their ability to recreate what they have seen). I find these details incredibly disturbing. But the fact remains that the sexualization of children is nothing new; the prevalence and omnipresence of it is, on the other hand. The actual act of viewing pornography is nothing in and of itself. It is the causes and effects of this act that beg an interrogation of the issue.

I am going to qualify my argument, now, with the fact that besides Sociology 100 and an English course that focused on modern British women playwrights featuring feminist plays from the 70s many of which focused on the issue of pornography, I have no expertise with this issue. But that's not going to stop me from taking a look at it.

So what are the causes behind this trend? Availability, for sure. I'm sure that all the studies that have been done with food that demonstrate that the more options you have the more you consume would also apply to porn. It's not just one magazine featuring individuals in the buff some teen managed to steal from the drugstore-- it's an infinite number of individuals, pairs, and groupings in every sexual situation imaginable. It's still frame. It's digitally recorded. It's live. It's interactive. It's crazy. And just as increased availability has created eating disorders, so, too must porn be creating sexual disorders.

Another cause? Misguided feminism. The empowerment of female sexuality was an important component of the Feminist movement, no doubt. Women should be in charge of their own bodies-- to be the ones to decide how and when it would be used, to have their pleasure be a priority in sexual relationships, to determine whether or not they want to procreate. However, the tit-for-tat mentality around men's sexual behaviours-- if they can do it so can we-- needs to be examined critically. Just because men were championed for sleeping around, does not mean that women are equal if they are, too. Perhaps instead of seeking to be at par with males, the idea should be to hold them to the same standard as females rather than sinking to their level. Going out to the bar, getting hammered, and taking home someone whose name you don't know and whose face you'd rather not look at in the morning is not an empowering act, no matter your gender. Using your sexuality to get jobs you don't otherwise deserve or sexually manipulating those over whom you have authority does not make you more powerful, in fact it highlights your weaknesses. Showing your private parts (whether penises or breasts) publicly does not earn you respect. Sending somone a picture or video of yourself in compromising positions will not make them love you, but it sure will make you infamous. Being able to give amazing oral sex is not something you can put on your resume, unless you are a porn star, which in my mind is tantamount to being a professional hot dog eating contestant.

On top of all this, in my humble opinion, kids have too much free time-- especially unsupervised and online. Honestly. If they didn't, this might not be such an issue. Kids used to have way more responsibilities that took up their time. Kids also used to do their homework, and those who didn't dropped out of school and got jobs. I'm in no way trying to romanticize those days, but simply trying to point out: when kids don't even have to so much as take out the trash, they have plenty of idle time. And you know what they say about idle hands... Seriously, though, kids used to experience what it was to learn something and get good at it through repetition. The trivialization of manual ("menial") labour robbed kids of the experience of seeing a job from start to finish, of the joy that comes from creation. Kids need satisfaction and if they're not going to get it from school or from work, they're going to seek it elsewhere. The inherent need to master skills has led them to "master" their sexualities.

Don't get me wrong. I am not trying to villainize nudity or expressions of healthy sexuality. But there is a spectrum of value to be placed on erotic media and sexual behaviours. From Harlequins to Hardcore, there's a wide range and I am not afraid to deem some of it unhealthy. If sexuality is addressed in a realistic manner in literature or a film, within a context beyond just getting it on, I'm all for it. I can say for certain, though, that rape fantasies and beastiality are not just bad taste, but completely unacceptable. Another way to look at it is that, generally speaking, I oppose violence. But in the same way that I wouldn't mind my child watching a martial arts demonstration by experts but would mind them witnessing someone getting jumped in an alley, I think that there is a time and a place for sexuality to be discussed and explored and that there are some forms that the world would be better without.

So why is porn a problem? First, it teaches kids that sexual manipulation is a desirable form of power, when in fact, like violence and money it is an illegitimate source that does nothing to build character or self-esteem. While it may feel powerful to seduce someone purely for your use, once the act is complete, there is no lasting agency of influence. Like a drug, you will need another hit.

Second, it objectifies, commodifies, and dehumanizes the concept of a sexual partner, which makes it difficult to empathize with them. After all, why would you identify with a sex toy? And if you can't empathize with your sexual partner, what hope do you have to ever develop true intimacy? We wonder why marriages are failing; this may just be a contributing factor.

On a global scale, if sexual partners are simply tools for your gratification, why would you care about the millions of sex slaves and rape victims world wide? While it is atrocious to me that kids are having their sexual identities corrupted by these unrealistic and demented portrayals of sex, my heart aches for girls sold by their families to brothel owners and boys imprisoned with pedophiles. Pornography, especially that online, is inextricably linked to the global sex trade-- from child pornographers hiding in anonymity, to girls who are tricked into thinking that this might be a way out of poverty.

Usually, I agree with the "what goes on in your bedroom is none of my business" philosophy, but when porn leaves the bedrooms of consenting adults and enters the world in which our children play and victimizes the most vulnerable in our midst, it should become our business. Something needs to be done.

Let Working Dogs Work

White Knights are Old News

You know what I really want to see? More movies about someone who isn't white saving someone who is...

Don't get me wrong. I can see the human message in titles like these...

Blackboard Jungle
To Kill a Mockingbird
Dangerous Minds
Freedom Writers
Entre les murs
Blindside

I realize that there is more at play here in terms of class issues and disproportional representation of minority groups living in poverty, but I really do believe in the power of film to alter the public's perception of what is normal and what is not. It would be nice for it to be normal for people of racial minorities to be in a position other than victim in this genre of film.

Comments on News Stories

I've got a bone to pick with online news. Whose great idea was it to allow any nincompoop with an account to comment on news stories? I have yet to come up with an ends that justifies providing a platform for ignoramuses to be so damn inflammatory and insensitive.

Though we don't live in one, in an ideal world, news is an objective reporting of facts. I accept that news can never be completely free from bias, but I don't believe it should stop trying. If I wanted conjecture, sarcasm, right-fighting, and conspiracy theories, I would read letters to the editor, head down to a local coffee shop, turn on The View or Fox News, or read blogs. When I choose to read the news, that's what I want. News.

Now, it's partially my own fault for scrolling down to the comments, but it is like a terrible accident off the news-highway that I just have to see. Leave it to these keen commenters to completely ignore the humans involved in a given story and instead push their own agendas. Seriously-- a baby falls to its death and you want to speculate that the mother did it on purpose? The CBC thinks that is worth printing for all the world to see? Dozens of people are slaughtered in the Philippines and you chose this forum to foist your anti-Muslim sentiments? I'm definitely more informed now, after that racist rant!

In the digital world there are endless venues at which the "average Joe(anne)" can spout off-- Facebook statuses, Twitter, blogs, forums, chat rooms, custom designed pages for their own special brand of propaganda. Isn't that enough? Can't we just leave the news alone?

Say What You Mean and Mean What You Say

Way to go, little buddy.

Self-[Redemption] Deprecation

Have you seen that episode of The Office where Jim teaches Michael that self-deprecation can make people forget or at least forgive your mistakes? Of course, Michael takes it too far by admitting that he couldn't even think of five friends to add to his cell phone plan and instead of winning everyone over he just makes everyone incredibly uncomfortable.

I digress.

What is it about self-deprecation that is so disarming? It's like anyone, no matter how awful their transgressions, gets a get-get-out-of-jail-free-card if they just drop their ego for a couple minutes and admit they're jackasses.

Take Jon Gosselin, for example. In case you are not keeping up with the whole saga, here's the Cole's Notes:

Dude marries young. He and Kate have twins. Then they have sextuplets. Along comes reality TV show. Five years later, he's fed up and leaves with a 22 year old school teacher. He has multiple girlfriends, buys one boobs, and starts snorting coke and partying with girls in bikinis. Dude goes on national television and says he despises his estranged wife after like less than a month of separation. During his visitation with his kids, he gets a babysitter (who he happens to be diddling) to look after them so he can go out and party more, refusing to let their mother do the babysitting. He steals over $200 thousand from their bank account after he is fired by TLC.

Definition of jackass.

But then he goes and makes this Funny or Die video and it's a little harder for me to hate him. I mean, I still do and it's not THAT hard, but it is slightly more difficult. What's up with that?

Jon Gosselin Goes Back in Time from Jon Gosselin

In case you haven't gotten the message yet...

PLEASE take a minute and vote for this project. After you register, you can vote once a day per email address and it only lasts a few more days. They were in the top ten all last week, but the weekend, the Stat, and parent teacher interviews killed them as their kids did not have access to internet while they were away. It is such a worthy cause-- just read the description and you will see what I mean.

Lest We Forget

So I was reading our Staff Announcements and "The Week Ahead" section looked like this:

Monday:
Volleyball Tournament

Tuesday:
Remembrance Day Ceremony P.2/P.3
Career Fair

Wednesday:
Remembrance Day!

Thursday:
School Dance

Friday:
Math Meeting

I realize teachers work hard and this day off is going to provide some much needed rest, but seriously. Worst exclamation use ever.

Poetry Fail

I know. I'm a sucky blogger, but I just haven't cared enough about anything to write lately. I'll work on that. In the mean time, you watch this.

Kinetic Typography-- Mad as Hell!

Technology catches a lot of flack for wrecking all that is good and of merit and artistic in the world. Pieces like this remind me that, like any medium, technology is a tool. Whether it is used for good or for bad, for the significant or the trivial is up to the crafts[hu]man.

Mad As Hell! Kinetic Typography from Aaron Leming on Vimeo.