C and I often argue jokingly. It's kind of therapeutic. It helps us to make light of our own irrational frustrations and takes the heat out of our more serious "discussions." Here is an example from last night. You will need to know that 1. I frequently accuse C of failed attempts at plotting my demise (this is funnier than it sounds in writing), 2. many nights as of late I have woken up with little to no covers on my side of the bed and 3. Chris's memory isn't his best trait.
C: (entering the room) Thanks for fixing the covers.
S: (scoffing) Well, it's not like I would let you do it... cover thief.
C: (handing me the Vicks) If I had so much malice for you, would I do nice things like bring you the Vicks?
S: (spotting some schmutz on the side of the container) Oh, I know you want it to seem like a kind gesture, but your ruse is up.
C: Ruse?
S: What do you have to say about THIS?
C: What IS that?
S: Don't play dumb with me. It's peanut butter! Aka another failed attempt on my life.
C: (voice dripping with sarcasm) Yeeessss, Sleeves. I put peanut butter on the vicks in the hopes that you were allergic and would rub it all over your throat causing anaphalactic shock and then I would have the covers all to myself! Muhahahahaha.
S: I realize that your tone is intended to point out the unlikeliness of my little theory, but I would like for you to offer one REASONABLE explanation for there being PEANUT BUTTER on the VICKS.
C: I forgot I got some on it when it was next to the toaster.
S: You? Forget? IMPOSSIBLE! You never forget...
C: Well now you're just being sarcastic.
S: You're basically like an elephant!
C: (thinking)
S: You never forget a thing!
C: I would argue that elephants and I have absolutely nothing in common.
S:Oh really. Ever see a little movie called DUMBO?
C: Actually, I...
S: Doesn't matter if you have-- all you need is the title!
C: Touche.
S: Good night, Dumbo.
C: Good night, Crazy.
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